April 24, 2008

The Existential Meaning of “Granite”

Recent posts on Sweet Digs Seattle:

• Where Everybody Knows Your Name (on the Eastside)
• Are You Being Left Out of the Economic Stimulus Package Rebate Checks?

 

My mind wanders–alot, in fact. Actually, I think this is pretty characterstic of the female gender. By nature, it’s more difficult for us to fall asleep because we just don’t have that on/off switch that males do. In fact, instead of shutting down at night, we go into some hyper warp speed processing mode that causes us to get even crazier at night. Our minds wander from topic to topic and pretty soon, we’re in an all out frenzy about stuff that has to be done, stuff that should be done, stuff that didn’t get done–there’s no way that we’re gonna fall asleep! And so the thoughts just keep coming… Well, last night…this morning…whatever it was…I don’t know how I got there, but I started to really think about the true meaning of granite. 

I mean, hey, you hear it all the time–put your money into your kitchen and master bath–that’s what sells homes! But what is it that makes granite so special? Why are we conditioning our children to grow up and revere granite? Is it so rare that people are willing to pay tens of thousands more for a home with granite countertops? Last time I looked, you could get it at Home Depot or Costco, so it can’t be a scarcity issue. What is the hidden agenda behind granite? Well, here’s my theory. 

I don’t believe that it’s the actual granite that sells the home. I think it’s what the granite represents that sells the home.  For one thing, granite is a relatively new material for homes. I mean, it just wasn’t used in the 1950’s for example. Richie, Potsie, and Ralph Malph did not snack around Mrs. C’s granite countertops. So the existence of granite really just means that the home has been updated somewhat recently. And if the home’s been updated, this really just means that the somebody cared about the home.

Therefore, the real meaning of granite is just that somebody gave a rat’s a$#! about the home. Period.

So sure, granite has a reputation for being costly, but really, unless your house is wallpapered in granite, you’re talking about relatively small amount of the stuff. What? Maybe $10,000-ish for the countertops in an average-ish sized home. Add $10,000 to the cost of any home and you could actually choose the granite that you like! Why pay a premium for granite that somebody else chose?!

Whew! Now that I’ve finished with my rant on the over-importance of granite, maybe I’ll sleep better tonight.

Zzzzzzzz…….

---